


Bucky Barnes' Concept of Time

by proudlystanning



Category: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Canon Divergence - Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Fix-It of Sorts, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-28
Updated: 2019-04-28
Packaged: 2020-02-08 17:39:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 857
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18628084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/proudlystanning/pseuds/proudlystanning
Summary: Time messed him up again, just when his brain could come into terms with the wonder and horror of the time, it messed up with his heart instead.





	Bucky Barnes' Concept of Time

Concept of time has always been a lot to digest for him. Always.

It messed up his brain for more time than he could count. First was to wake up from what he thought was the end of his line, only to know it was the start of something worse than death itself.

He has been through times, it was a lot and he was doing great not breaking under such mess, at least that was when Shuri said when she was trying to get him through the life he had, and the life he is about to have. 

Waking up to different decades for most of the time is confusing, but back then understanding and feeling shit was not his priority. There is a mission to be done and that was it. He may be manipulated, controlled and ripped away from choice but he remembered his mission. 

Time could wait. He has a purpose and he would have all the time Hydra would want him to have.

Then Steve showed up, calling out his name and all those fragmented years came back in shattered pieces. He found him, saved him from himself and gave him a try to feel good about himself again, Bucky was not sure he could do that, but Steve’s presence and stories, kind of make-believe for him.

Things could turn out differently, for better or worst. He could have a life, could live, and he could learn to love again. That was then, he thought, he could have time to himself, to take it as he would. From the records, he mostly just messed up but at least it was his will. 

But then again, some shit happened, he woke up next to Sam who was just as confused as he was about whatever that was happening. Steve was not there, a lot of people was not there but some sort of Wizard showed up and said the war was not over.

Yeah, he knew, when was the war is over for him. How about never. 

That fancy wizard added that they needed help, Stark kid and Steve and that God he barely knew but liked already, THEY need help. Bucky was a good soldier, he knew ‘cause he was trained as one. He grabbed his gun and whatever that is left and going to an unfamiliar battlefield. Thinking about nothing but please, let him has his time, let him have something that makes sense. 

When all was done and he was standing next to Steve again, he thought, he could have that. Time, life, meaning, chances and everything

Then he saw what was in his eyes. 

He felt like may have all of that, but he was not sure if he will be with or without the Man

 

 

 

Bucky was not sure how he felt about that.

 

 

 

Bruce started counting down shit, he felt like he stops breathing since Steve disappeared on that portal. He cracked a subtle smile, he did not know how it looks but from Sam’s look, he knew his expression made Sam worried. 

 

He cracked because of this alienating feeling. Time messed him up again, just when his brain could come into term with the wonder of time, it messed up his heart instead. 

 

5 seconds were shorter than any other miserable moment in his life, under Hydra captive, under years in Romania confusing and alone, this was a blink of an eye.

 

But it broke him harder than most.

 

5 seconds felt like a lifetime. Literally, it could be a lifetime for Steve. He knew that tone of his voice and a resting smile on his face. He felt like he knew what Steve was going to do but at the same time, he felt like he did not. 

 

Maybe it’s the end of this line.

 

From the newest shit he knew about time and the alternatives existed somewhere, he knew there could be what? like other 14 million lines. 

 

He hoped there’s a line out there where he could be with Steve at the end of it.

 

To say all the unspoken shit, to look him in the eye when saying it.

 

He started to get very nervous and broke into tears, and even though he has grown closer to Sam and would even consider him good friend, he did not like the idea that man seeing him cry. He backed up and thinking about walking away, to not seeing his greatest fear comes true.

 

Oh shit, crying was also a new shit. He learned so much, pretty sure Shuri would be impressed to see the wide ranges of emotions he let himself immersed into.

 

“2..”

 

“1..”

 

 

 

 

“Hey, where are you going?” 

 

He turned, and yes, he knew Sam would not let him forget the day he cried like an idiot, tears all over his face, running back to Steve and hugging him so tight while listening to the love of his life’s soft laugh against his ears.

 

 

“…you punk” 

 

“I take all the stupid back to you ‘cause it’s your thing” 

 

“More like our thing”

 

“Yeah..ours”

 

 

Maybe this is the line. Our line.

**Author's Note:**

> I mean even though the scene was too harsh on us Stucky people but I kinda loved the experience and of course I love you, Bucky Barnes.


End file.
